Ugh

Yet another goal of 2019 failed (this time a main one). I really did not expect to not get into volleyball EXCO but I guess I took a risk with my speech and tested the waters, and I drowned a little. I guess I might be too serious and too tryhard and didn't really have many concrete plans that were chill and fun like merch and that didn't sit well with much of my team.

Why is it not enough to be very passionate about volleyball and willing to devote so much time and effort into the team?

My spirits are dampened but I know I shouldn't let that get in the way of me trying my best to improve and help my team improve. But it really sucks for now.

So many things not going my way so far. Also really tired and lack of sleep is not nice. Times like these really make me question myself and what I've accomplished and why I even try and get me really down.

But ok, I have been getting some unexpected surprises like tutor leader which is quite cool.

They say when one door closes another one opens and I really really hope things take a turn for the better.