Sometimes

I do better than expected for something (e.g. competitions and tests), and I'm quite happy. Then other times I don't do so well, and I realise so many people are better than me, not just in that area, but in so many other areas, and I feel so inadequate. It is demoralising once I realise average I am and why am I even trying to hard to get to a good school when I obviously cannot do it because look at my achievements and ability and compare it to others who do so much better. Why even try so hard when they are clearly going to go much farther in this subject area that I thought I was decent in but I am probably just above average. And then I'll just end up in a normal school, and they say life will go on but that's kind of sad.